tonyderbott:

Aussie terror suspect questioned, released

What a shame

tonyderbott:

Aussie terror suspect questioned, released

What a shame

(via auspolandallthat)

xdream-strongx:

THE. GREATEST.

(Source: kristoffbjorgman, via nyxblogs)

mat-torah said: My school has organised a Red Cross Blood Drive and I'm donating today. I am about 98% sure that my blood won't be saving lives but will instead be used by our Reptilian Overlord. I've heard that the Lizard King plans to exploit its rejuvenating properties so that he can maintain his own vitality, can you corroborate this claim?

No one is truly entirely sure what happens in the deepest darkest parts of his nest-cave. This could it, but herpetologists also theorize he is doing experiments on this blood to find out our weaknesses so he can better exploit them.

My friend coined this the other day, I think he’s onto something.

I love that username. It’s like the Australian public itself was liking my posts.

I love that username. It’s like the Australian public itself was liking my posts.

A photographer has captured the exact moment that Tony Abbott has realised he has tricked a white middle class suburban family into giving him their baby. Their smiling faces were immediately wiped off their faces a second after the photo was taken when Tony absconded with the baby yelling “FOOLS! You thought you could trust me when I said “please give me your baby I promise I will not eat it”! Haven’t you learned that promises don’t mean shit to me? Thanks for the free meal suckers!” He then ran through the crowd and escaped into the night, calling back “this is a metaphor for our nation!” before disappearing entirely.

A photographer has captured the exact moment that Tony Abbott has realised he has tricked a white middle class suburban family into giving him their baby. Their smiling faces were immediately wiped off their faces a second after the photo was taken when Tony absconded with the baby yelling “FOOLS! You thought you could trust me when I said “please give me your baby I promise I will not eat it”! Haven’t you learned that promises don’t mean shit to me? Thanks for the free meal suckers!” He then ran through the crowd and escaped into the night, calling back “this is a metaphor for our nation!” before disappearing entirely.

Joe Hockey believes that the fuel excise won’t effect poor people because they don’t own cars.

Other misconceptions about the poor from the Liberal party include: Tony Abbott thinks they have claws and elongated snouts that they use to avoid getting a job… somehow… Scott Morrison believes that poor people are incapable of feeling pain… especially if they’re not from around here. Rupert Murdoch, though not a member of the Liberal party, occasionally calls Tony’s office to tell him that poor people are “quantum locked” and only exist when someone needs to be blamed for the ills of society caused by the rich.

Anonymous said: I'm not sure if you know, but maybe you do, but tony Abbott wasn't even born in Australia, yet he has the nerve to send the asylum seekers away from Australia, and say some people weren't meant to come to this country... He truly is an animal lol...

Yeah. He came here on a boat and everything. But hey now let’s not over simplify this situation to simply “they both came on boats.” His was a fancy boat, not one of those dangerous ones that desperate asylum seekers use because they’d rather risk death by drowning in a vast unforgiving sea than stay where they are due to persecution and war. Tony’s family just decided to move to a different country.

Anonymous said: My mum used to do security work along The Strand in Townsville, and she said that one time Tony's car pulled up into a no-parking spot so she told them to move along, and he said something along the lines of "don't you know who I am?" and she said "yes but it's still illegal, move along". Heh

Classic Tony.

groovierthanthou said: i like how abbot is trying to make it out like the scrapping of the changes was all part of his plan for a stronger Australia and to fight terrorism or some shit. i guess those spin doctors are finally doing something.

Yeah I was so confused by that. “I’m scrapping letting racists be even more racists… why? Counter-terrorism. Not “to be a decent person” but because of terrorism.”

"But how is that conne-"

"I’M NOT AS BAD AS THE GILLARD GOVERNMENT FOR BREAKING MY ELECTION PROMISE HERE, OK? I’M NOT AS BAD. I WILL MAKE A STRONGER AUSTRALIA.”

"Geez man, cool down. Cool down. Just take my wallet and let me go!"